What my english teacher writes to me;

This year:
"A poor attempt Jimmy. You've barely made a substantial comment and your thesis is underdeveloped this flawed. Put more effort in please!!!"

Last year:
"A poor attempt Jimmy. You've obviouslly done this half heartedly. you need to develop a much more academic tone in your sresponses. At the moment this is like a series of thoughts and i know that you can do much better"

This is the teacher that calls me lazy, and an underacheiver, among many other colourful words.

I don't get it. Im lazy. She knows that, i know that. She should be happy i've managed to put pen to paper - the whole world knows that, its just troubling that she writes it like i've somehow actually expected better.

Im partially glad I go used to failing all the time, because i look at the people around me - and i feel anxious that they might all find a mass suicide cult and emancipate themselves if they acheive a "lowly" UAI of 98.

all day, work work. work work all day. Seemly apologise for their short commings, they will enter a world where theres no such thing as "study" - then thats when they will realise that preparation is only a myth.